Surf and Sleep

You know what's relaxing and cost effective if you've got insomnia?

Online shopping but not buying anything. I really think it's best to wait till morning to decide. If one can't even find the credit card, it's better to just go back to sleep.

Or if that doesn't work, I can always keep looking at pajamas.

Goodnight.

Merry Christmas to everyone!

I defy anyone to watch, It's A Wonderful Life and A. Not Cry and B. Have a newfound appreciation for all your friends and family. And C: Not want to marry Jimmy Stewart.

Sitting in my new Christmas jammies, with my lap top. My family has already opened our gifts and ate our turkey. It was delicious. Shane did a good job with it.

Tomorrow we've got the whole day open to sleep, lounge and hang out. Then we'll meet up to go to the movies, and perhaps visit each other some more.

Merry Christmas to all my friends and family. I love you all. A special shout out to Colleen who is in Alambama. I hope you're doing something festive.

Love you.

Catching UP

In honor of the fact that I haven't blogged in almost a month, and I met my old writing friends for a carb loaded fabulous lunch today, and I'm filled with optimism and hope, well, I decided to blog.

Had a great weekend. Dinner with Usha on Friday night, despite terrible snowy conditions. Saturday, was last minute shopping and then chores. After that it was off to Connie's for our annual Christmas gathering. We hung out, had drinks, had a great dinner that Connie cooked for us, and then I spent the night.

When somebody is your friend for that long, it's just nice hanging out together and enjoying Christmas. And Connie knows me well, and always gets me the perfect gift. This year, was a gift card for Ann Taylor Loft, the movie the Holiday and some assorted treats for my movie night.

Today was the fore mentioned lunch with my wonderful writing group and our annual holiday book exchange.

One and half days of work this week and then it's onto Christmas break.

And the older I get, the more absurd romantic comedies become. With a few exceptions. One being, Love Actually.

Because it's about all kinds of love, and it truly makes me feel happy when I watch it. I defy anyone to scorn at the child who plays LIam Neeson's son, as he runs through the airport to confess his true love for a classmate.

Or the unrequinted love for Laura Linney that would be finally realized, but she won't allow her own personal happiness to interfere with the well being of her brother, who is mentally ill.

It's Gonna Be A Good Day

You know how it's gonna be a good day?

Plenty of sleep, lots of coffee while watching a Paul Newman movie, and the sun is shining.

And oh yeah, meeting up friends later to see the new James Bond movie.

On my way to get the last Stephanie Plum book out of the library, and then maybe a pedicure. Just because it's been a long week. And I can.

All this before 11 a.m.

Oh Boy.

Don't Say You Know If you Don't

Over this past weekend, I ventured to Brooklyn in NYC to visit some friends. Specifically, my old art director partner and his family.

Had an awesome time. They really made me feel welcome in their home, and I felt very at ease. New York, I have visited a few times, but it seems I was always just in the Manhatten area. It was nice seeing some different things.

Went to a dive bar called the Patriot, where you can get a $9.00 pitcher of beer and a decently stacked jukebox full of old country.

Visited another bar called, Chocolate Bar where all they serve is chocolate, desserts and wine to accompany both.

Did some shopping. And a little napping. Ate some authentic Brooklyn pizza by the slice.

Went out for the night and came home and 5am.

Spent a day at Coney Island which was crazy wonderful. We had drinks in this closed up bar with a bartender who asked me my sign, told me stories about Mitch Ryder, Jackie Wilson, and Al Capone. All the while, I sipped free beer.

All in all, a wonderful escape. A great trip. I can't wait to go back.

Unfinished

Kook almost died,
Born to early.
Too small-that’s what everyone said.
It’s better to let go.

But Brian and Susie prayed on.
And put Joe in Charge
Of God-fathering.
Full of light and jokes,
Joe kept Kook laughing.

As the years passed, Kook got healthy
But Joe got sick.

There was still laughter and light
That was Joe’s way.
Kook couldn’t help him.
She could only hug him.

It’s better to let go.
Tell him good-bye-

And pray that isn’t the last time,
Kook and Joe
will see eye to eye.

New Day

I'm proud and hopeful this morning, for a new dawn in America.

John Mccain, I felt gave a very classy concession speech.

And Obama proved that one man can move a nation.

And I lost weight after a month of see sawing back and forth on the scale.

Good things lie ahead.

November 4th

Voted. Vaccinated.

Check and check.

No matter who wins, a change is coming.

And for that, I'm thankful.

To Do

Sad wave is still crashing.

Alas, Monday is almost over. And tomorrow is already turning into a busy day: Voting, flu shot, lunch with a friend from out of town.

Man.

Hope I'll be able to get my work done sometime in between there. :)

Fear not.

Fat Tastic

I feel like I've been swallowed whole by my inner fat girl today.

Haven't wanted to leave the couch all day, and I didn't except for a quick stop to the grocery store.

What's wrong with me? Having a sad day, I guess.

Maybe thinking about eating cookies. But I didn't.

Perhaps the gym in the morning will shake me up?

What Do You Think?

Red Riding Hood or Unabomber?

Thursday

Lots to do today, so I will keep this brief. Trying to get back to my usual steadfast morning gym routine. Score 1 for me. I did it this morning.

My goal is to go for the next 15 or 16 days in a row, because that's how long my gym membership is paid up until then. My plan is by then to have my momentum back. I'll be armed and ready for the new gym.

Mad Men Season Finale on Sunday didn't disappoint. It was quite good actually. But, I will say no more in case you haven't had the chance to catch it.

Still reading, Lean Mean 13 from Janet Evanovich.

Supposed to go to a networking party tonight, which usually just means I visit whomever came with me, but we'll see how it unfolds.

I'm out.

Whirl Weekend

What a whirlwind weekend.

A concert in Ann Arbor on Friday. A folk singer that my cousin Shannon introduced me to, named Melissa Ferrick. Good show. Some funny banter. I really enjoy when musicans seem to appreciate the crowd they are playing for. It makes it so much warmer to watch.

Then a family wedding on Saturday, for my cousin John. Such a great guy. I'm so happy for him. His new wife, Amanda has a son, Dakota and John is now a dad.

Couldn't ask for a better one. John lost his dad when he was just a baby, but I'm sure his dad would be so proud of the man, his son has become.

The wedding was quite a party, but when there's a shuttle bus and no worries about drinking, all you have to worry about is your liver.

I'm always humbled and honored to be part of such a large, loving family so full of Irish pride that it's truly amazing.

We are blessed, despite recent sad events. We shall heal and grow stronger still.
We are family.

Apples to Apples

The good news?

I ate an apple with my lunch.

The Bad news?

It had Carmel and nuts all over it.

But, in the grand scheme of things, it's still better than a slab of cheesecake.

Misc. Musings

Can't wait for the weekend and it's only Tuesday. Heading up north on Friday with Connie, for some relaxation. And it'll give me the perfect venue to deliver my mom's birthday present.

On the off chance that she's reading this, I won't mention what I got her. But I'm sure she's gonna love it.

Feeling very sleepy today. Although I did drag myself out of bed this morning and headed to the gym. I'm trying hard to get back to my morning routine. Going walking after work too. Figured it couldn't hurt to get some extra exercise.

Trying to start a revision of a story I started a while back. I'm inspired again, after quitting my writer's group. It feels liberating in a way. It's back on me to get myself writing.

And I find emotional pain a good source of inspiration. No excuses left. Not even a dog to eat my homework.

UScan-We All Do

Does anyone else think that those automatic check out machines at the grocery store, are handy but sad?

Let me explain. Personally, I find them useful and quick. But I have to wonder if the cashiers feel the same way? Now, they don't really ring you up, but are still forced to stand by and watch you do it.

I'd imagine it was a boring job before that somehow managed to get just a little more coma inducing.

And a side note: If you don't know how to use said machine, you sir should go wait in line for a human. I don't want to wait half an hour for you to figure it out.

Cool Hand Indeed

Butch: You know, when I was a kid, I always thought I'd grow up to be a hero.
Sundance Kid: Well, it's too late now.
Butch Cassidy: What'd you say that for? You didn't have to say something like that.


I was at a post funeral luncheon at the Elks club for my Uncle Joe when I learned about the death of Paul Newman. And even though we never met, I loved him.

I was first introduced to Paul Newman shortly after my parents divorced. My dad took me and my brothers on Sundays. And what do you do, with three kids? Watch Paul Newman movies of course. He was a man's man. And a woman's man. One look at him in his heyday and that's pretty clear.

But what I love about him, had little to do with his good looks. I loved to watch him act. He's one of the great ones. Able to act in a character role, and his adherence to privacy allowed the movie viewer to believe whatever role he was immersed in. Even in roles like Hud, where the main character was let's face it, a bastard, when played by Paul Newman, he was still like able.

And in an age where Hollywood marriages last about as long as a trip to the local drive thru, it was amazing he was married to the same woman for 50 years.

Long before charity seemed like a publicity stunt, he decided to give back and never sought out publicity unless it was benefiting other people.

An amazing actor and a great philanthropist, he will be missed. He represented all that was good in the world and we are all better for having him in it.
Butch Cassidy: Then you jump first.
Sundance Kid: No, I said.
Butch Cassidy: What's the matter with you?
Sundance Kid: I can't swim.
Butch Cassidy: Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.

Don't Be That Guy

Fun with Joe

I'm Sorry

Dear Uncle Joe,

I'm so sorry that you had to leave us on Saturday. I've seen your kids and Nancy. They are sad, strong, and we had some laughs on Sunday. Sugar Bear and I visited.

My dad called to tell me that you were gone.

You've been a wonderful uncle and god-father to me, and I can't even begin to fathom how much I'll miss you. I loved watching you and my dad. Loved when you called him Tubby, and got him in line. I'm thankful you had each other to help each other when you both got cancer. I'm happy that my dad had somebody that truly understood how much it sucked.

I'm hopeful that you're with Butch, Hope and Bill, Gary and Carol. And that you guys are having a drink and playing music. I'm looking forward to gathering on Saturday to honor your life. Me and all your other nieces and nephews, brothers and sisters.

Thank you for all that you did for each of us.

We will honor you, love you, and cherish you.

Today and every day.

I love you-

Kook

Joe and Tubby

You chose your friends. But you don't choose your family. But sometimes you're lucky enough to have a family that feels instead like a bunch of friends?

I'm lucky enough to have that sort of family. One large extended family that I truly enjoy. And one of them, My Uncle Joe who is also my Godfather is very sick with cancer right now.

And it is fucking unfair and horrible. And what else can I say? I feel awful for my aunt and for my four awesome cousins who call him dad. Growing up with my Uncle Joe was a trip like no other. And the only thing I can really relate it to, is growing up with my dad. I'd say the two of them are the most similar in their sense of humor and depth of carrying.

And they both share the Vietnam experierence. And cancer. WTF? Uncle Joe used to make us have GI parties where we'd basically all clean up the house, but he somehow convinced us that it was fun. And he calls my dad Tubby, his childhood nickname, but my dad is sadly way too thin these days.

But they've always been there for each other and I know no matter where the other one travels, they will still be together.

If you've got any prayers or well wishes, please send em our way. We're not ready for our soliders to march on.

5 Years Already

Today marks the 5th Anniversary of the death of the great musical icon, Mr. Johnny Cash.

You can listen to his radio show, hosted by his friend Bill Miller.

http://www.johnnycashradio.com

5 years ago today, I was home from Atlanta for the weekend, to celebrate my best friend Connie's wedding, and I graduated from Portfolio Center the following weekend.

Full of a giant case full of giant size ads, that I dragged around till I landed my first job as a copywriter.

To all my fellow PC Alum, especially my writer class. Many memories of the Clairmont Lounge, the Waffle House, and of course Central City Tavern.

It wouldn't have been the same without you guys.

Yeah

The new 90210? Why did I even try? To say I watched it, is a stretch. It was on and occasionally, I looked toward the moving light and sound that is the marvel invention of television, but I have no idea what was happening. Nor did I care.

I'll just go back to my fond memories of the original. I'm not in high school like I was during the original run. It seems, "I'm just not into it."

No sleep again last night. Makes me feel surly and crazy. It's stress-related. I have high hopes for tonight's bed regime.

Tonight, I'll be making my last batch of Glop, that veggie heavy dish my Grandma Gotshall invented. I've got to do something with all the vegetables I bought at the produce stand this weekend.

Purple Violets, Wine and Lake Michigan

Weekend in Leelanau was grand. Beach, wine, other assorted libations, relaxation.

Finished the new David Sedaris book: Engulfed in Flames. I enjoyed it. He fits like an old shoe and it's comforting to read him. He makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. My favorite story in the collection was about a crossword puzzle and a fellow passenger on a plane ride. To see how they all tie together, read his book.

That being said, my favorite Sedaris is still Naked and Me Talk Pretty One Day. Genius, both of them.

Watched, Dan in Real Life with Steve Carrell. It was a sweet story and a good one to watch up north in my opinion.

Yesterday when I got home, after I unpacked, I watched Purple Violets, the new Ed Burns.

I've got one word for you about Ed Burns: Yummy.

Seriously. This movie isn't for everyone, but I personally enjoy his films. They're always some aspect of human behavior or relationship that is focused on. Usually smaller budget and he wrote, directed, produced and starred in.

Go Eddie go.

Pep Talk

Sometimes, my biggest fear is ending up like Eleanor Rigby.

"All the lonely people. Where do they all belong? Writing the words of the sermon no one will hear."

I said this to a friend in Atlanta once, to which she replied:

"Don't worry. I know at least 3 people that will come to your funeral."

A Little Bit of Something

My need to think about something that isn't MYCO related overwhelms me. Oh, you don't know what I'm talking about?

Consider yourself lucky then. Used up the rest of my gift card today during lunch buying a wireless router. I'm hoping it's as easy to install as the directions claim.

Will let you know. It's only Tuesday and I'm already looking forward to the weekend. Heading up to Lake Leelanau again. I love it there. And one must go when the weather is good.

Purple Violets and Friday Night Lights Season 1, Disc 2 will be at waiting for me tomorrow. And you can see, I haven't solved the media addiction problem. I guess that's what makes me an addict, huh?

But Wait There's More

I'm tweaked out on media over-load this weekend.

For the first time in over three years, I've got cable tv. And my own Internet connection,speedy like lightning. No more slow signal, picked up from a neighbor. No.

All mine. Plus, my Netflix. And I kid you not a pile of free magazines, from a fruitful hunt last week from the media bins at work. Did I mention the piles of books that I own? The ones sitting around in piles?

And there's always more to be had. I'm over-stimulated. Too many channels, too many moving picture options. Let's not forget about Netflix. Started another series. Friday Night Lights. And dammit, it's good too even though it's about football, it's enough about other life stuff that the football is a nice back story, not the whole show.

Currently Reading: Candy Girl. Diablo Cody of Juno fame, startling revealing look about her one year as a stripper. But somehow, it's not seedy and she isn't judgemental in any way.

Now, I can sit on the couch while on my lap-top, surf the Internet, and search for something to watch while reading a few pages of my book or current magazine, (Conde Nast Traveler) on commercial breaks?

What the hell is wrong with me? :)

Gotta go. I can watch the new episode of Mad Men soon.

Mad Men

I love Mad Men. I first started watching this show on Netflix. About half way through the first disc, I knew I had something special and I bought the whole series.

And it was well-worth it. Fascinating to see the origins of the professions in advertising, the complete un-pc world brought to life with meticulous detail. It's truly spectacular.

Don Draper, the Creative Director. Peggy his secretary who dared to push out of that role to become, gasp, a woman copywriter. The scandal.

Pretty soon, I'm going to have to order cable tv because of the whole digital tv cross-over and for the first time in three years, I'll have cable again. But at least I'll also have Mad Men.

Tired of Tired

The night sure is long when you're awake for most of it. And when you finally fall asleep, it's 5:30 am. Good thing you reset your alarm for 8am.

No gym this morning. Perhaps a walk after work. I feel like a zombie. :)

Weekend Wrap Up

Weekend in a nutshell:

Relaxing.

Went to the Milford Memories Festival with Connie. To call it a festival is a stretch really. It's Milford's Main street closed off with art and food booths. But it's a tradition. We enjoyed ourselves.

Saturday I felt like a yuppie poser in training. Got up early. Walked to the Farmers Market with my eco-friendly recycable bag and bought fresh fruits and veggies. Came home, had breakfast and got ready to get my hair cut.

Way to much money later, I've got cute short hair again. Hooray! Then headed off to do a little shopping. I was hunting for part of Shane's birthday gift, but couldn't find what I was looking for. So, I ended up with a new dress for me. Funny how that worked. But it was on sale for $15.00.

By then, the shopping rush was on me and at the next stop, I found a matching purse. Bonus. The whole outfit was $35.00.

After that it was home for dinner. A short visit with Nevada ensued and then I decided to put in Rescue Dawn because I'd had it for a while.

It was too depressing for me. I know it must end ok because the guy lives, but all I could think about was my dad. And how scary and fucked up it must have felt being in the Vietnam War. This wasn't entertainment anymore, so I turned it off.

Yesterday, I actually managed to clean my house. Cleaned under my bathroom cabinet, throwing away old beauty products, not too many, and washed all of my laundry.

Oh and in between this, read a few stories in my new Sedaris book and finished, 10 Big Ones by Janet Evanovich. It was a quick fun perfect summer read. I started the next one in the series last night, because I just wanted a little more of the insanity that is Stephanie Plum.

I find two in a row of those are enough and it's best to come back later. Otherwise, the stories all run together. But I'm loving them all over again.

Yawn

I couldn't sleep last night. Acutely aware of every hour that ticked by on my digital dream denyer.

Woke up to discover our Mayor is in Jail for yet another stupid move. And it begs the question, just how stupid can one man be?

Started reading both the new Sedaris book, "When you're Engulfed in Flames", and Janet Evanovich's, 10 Big Ones, about the exploits of Stephanie Plum, Bounty Hunter.

Tomorrow I'll be enjoying a day off. A summer Friday they call it. I'll most certainly have no excuse not to get to the gym and get a little house cleaning done.

After that, I'm meeting Connie in Milford, for what's known as Milford Memories. A summer festival with art, food, and music.

Hopefully, my friend Nevada can come over and watch Harold and Maude too. She's never seen it.

Until we meet again.

Tuesday

Hello.

In a better mood than I was yesterday. Humid today. But that's ok. I'm off to see Becky for a visit.

Do you think 3 glasses of passion ice-tea from Starbucks counts as dinner?

This, That and the Other

Blah. Monday is over in a flurry of emails with !!!, as if that doesn't annoy me, but instead wants to make me work harder than I already am, while starting a new project and covering for a vacationing co-worker?

My weekend wasn't bad, although not to crazy either. Had writing group yesterday. It'd be nice to nail down something for writer group soon.

Started reading, When you're Engulfed in Flames by David Sedaris. So far, so good. Finished a book I got for my birthday almost two months ago, I Heard There Would be Cake. A cute book of essays, rather funny in the style of Sedaris.

Planning some little trips to ease the pain of living in this down-trodden state.

Plotting a visit with Becky tomorrow which is exciting. I get to see her for a visit and have a pedicure at the same time.

Hooray!

Oh and I started watching Season 6 of West Wing and decided to hold off the rest until Fall. Somehow watching a pretend President isn't good summer escape fare.

That's all for now.

Bring on Tuesday.

The Prince of TIdes

What a wonderful book.

I finally finished reading it this past weekend. And have thought about it every day since. I'm feeling a little sad that I don't get to spend any more time with Savannah, Luke or Tom. I miss Mr. Fruit, Tolitha and Grandpa Wingo.

This book took me a long time to read. Probably longer than it should have. But it was a book that I wanted to savor, to enjoy the finely tuned language in the capable hands of Pat Conroy.

And it is actually over 600 pages. But it told such an amazing story full of so much heart and so many characters, and each character was fully explored, fully embraced by both the author and the reader. Through his eyes, I fell in love with all the people in the story as if they were personal family or friends of mine.

This hasn't happened to be in a very long time. I was given another Conroy book, Beach Music by a fellow writer in my writing group that I'll be tearing into as soon as I possibly can.

Often it seems the story overtakes the language but this book is a beautiful marriage of poetic beauty and a wholly engrossing story.

Pick it up immediately.

Everybody's Working for the Weekend

Heading on vacation for a few days.

And I'm so excited. Summer is the best time to be in Michigan. Lots of lakes, lots of wineries, lots of sun and hopefully lots of beach time.

Leaving tomorrow morning which explains why today is passing oh so slowly. Most of my laundry is done, but I haven't put any of it in a suitcase yet. Shouldn't take that long.

Famous last words. :) Anyway enjoy the weekend. I'm sure I'll be enjoying mine.

And I definitely plan on carving out some time to catch the Dark Knight. Christian Bale? Heath Ledger? Good writing? Need I say more?

Cat Power

Is it just me, or when you hear Cat Stevens, do you get a sudden impulse to put on a long floral skirt, pack up your VOLVO, and skip through a meadow while eating a peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich on wheat bread?

Pinball, Corner Pocket

I'm having so many thoughts right now that I can't seem to pin even one down. My brain feels like a pinball machine.

Bing. Bing. I want to go to a Tigers game. And a Lions game with my brother. I need to go see my dad before I leave for the weekend. I should get my oil changed. I need to finish up this project. Bang. I loved seeing my cousins yesterday both the originals and the added, meaning my cousin Ed. He's technically not my cousin, but I call him my cousin. He's married to my cousin Shannon. I love them both. Such great people. And very fun to be around. And they never judge me when I say something crazy. Notice I say when? I'm quirky. Can't help it. I say weird things sometimes. You either love me or you think I'm nuts. I'm fine with either. Bing, Bing. Man, am I sleepy. I sure could use a nap, but I won't take one. Tonight, I'm hoping for peace outside my bedroom window. I can't wait to go on vacation on Friday with Connie. Swimming, hanging out, drinking wine, and relaxing sounds like such a great idea. Had lots of fun with my cousin Lacy. It was her birthday yesterday. 21 is a big deal. I remember mine. I was hungover for two days. Probably had alcohol poisoning, but we didn't really know about that then. I got an engraved beer mug. And a black t-shirt with a giant bottle of Budweiser on the front. Classy I know. The new Batman is gonna be so good. Love Christian Bale. Bang, bong. I used to be good at pinball back in the day. Now I suck. It's ok. I've made peace with the fact I'm not good at video games, kickball or hooking up electronics.

Monday Monday

Sleep was a bit elusive last night. Let us examine why?

Thoughts of work today kept my brain from fulling shutting off. About the time my brain did shut off, two feral cats started fighting underneath my window screaming like wild banshees the only way cats can.

Then it was muggy. I felt clammy under my comforter. Finally started getting good rest about 5am which means I slept through the alarm and didn't make it to the gym this morning.

Rough morning. But here's hoping the rest of the day goes smoothly. I'm a little scared to eat lunch though. I'm wearing new white pants, which is just asking for me to spill something on myself.

Fingers crossed I don't.

Happy Birthday to my cousin Lacy. She's an awesome person who happens to related to me, but I'd like to think we'd still hang out even if we weren't family.

Hopefully, I can swing by your dinner celebration.

The Coffee Mug

The mug was cheap,
but I gave it with love,
Using my allowance.
Hoping at Christmas when the paper was torn,
you would be happy.
Unfounded fears.
Michigan State’s green and white,
and no one cheered louder than you.

Holding it,
memories stack like Petoskey stones
on the shores of Lake Michigan.
Rush Limbaugh, Don Ho’s Tiny Bubbles,
and your ranting about the goddamn democrats
with a sparkle in your eye,
Sipping your coffee black.

The brilliance of Christmas
green and white diminished this year.
You had to go,
but I wish
we had time
for one last cup.


In Memory of William W.Gotshall.

Reading This. Not That

Enjoyed the gym this morning. It feels good to work out before work. Before I'm fully awake, fully thinking, and fully present. It's a nice way to wake myself up.

And I'm not saying the gym is a magical pill that makes everything better, but it does make crap seem, well a little less crappy.

I'm looking forward to going home tonight and reading my book. The Prince of Tides in case anyone was wondering. The language is beautiful and the story is wholly engrossing. It's taking me a little while to work through it, but that's ok. It's like a good piece of chocolate and shouldn't be inhaled in 10 seconds. Not to get the whole affect.

Unlike a book I read over the weekend with a shiny cover, titled, "Not Another Bad Date." But, it really should have been called,"Not Another Bad Book."

I knew it was a fluffy stupid read, but I really wasn't expecting it to be that awful.

I know better. That's what I get for taking a break.

But fear not,I'm back to a good book. And like that good piece of chocolate, I'll savor it.

Monday

UGH.

I'm in a bad mood today. And it hasn't gotten any better. And what do I have to look forward to tonight?

A teeth cleaning. Which isn't a bad thing, but I really don't feel like going to the dentist.

Maybe if I go for a nice long walk after the dentist, I'll start feeling a little bit better.

I just don't understand why things never work out for me? Why do I have to struggle all the damn time?

And if somebody says, "That's just life", consider yourself slapped.

Because I say so

What do you get when you cross a lunch time trip to Target with your bloaty, emotionally charged mood swings while in the throes of your period?

1. Californication on DVD. David Duchnoney is half naked, witty,and a writer.
2. Carefree panty-liners.
3. OPI Nail polish in Cherry, Cherry Bada Bing.
4. A 10 package box of 94% Fat free Kettle Korn popcorn.
5. A mint musketeer chocolate bar.

I already have the midol in case you were wondering.

Old Man and the Sea

Happy Birthday to the man I used to call Daddy Quinlan.

Now, I call him dad. And he is a dad in that sense.

Checking to make sure I've got gas money to get back and forth, making sure I know where I'm going, and if not happy to give me directions, offers dating advice like, "Plumbers need love too.
And he bought me a corsage because my prom date was a dead-beat.

Took me on excursions. Like the time we went fishing. We had to get up super early. Our first fishing trip, I hooked my pole into my dad's back and he coached me on the fine art of removal using his large fishing knife. In my defense, I was only eight.

Worried about my taking a sick day when I'm sick. He's not quite familiar with the corporate environment I roam around in during the week.

Helped me fix or purchase various cars. We finally got it right on the last one. A.It still runs great and B. It's all paid off.

Paid lots of his own money to send me to school in Atlanta so I could get paid to sit in my cubicle and write a birthday blog to him that I know he won't read.

The computer is a skill he's learning. And getting better. We used to have tech support phone calls to ease the confusion for him.

Rumor has it, my dad used to carry me every where when I was a child.

I'm to big to be carried in the literal sense of the word but I still am grateful every day that my dad is here.

Present and accounted for. He's been sick for almost 5 years now.

But he presses on. And so do I.

And really, on a birthday you can't ask for more than a life that keeps bringing you surprises, kids that love you, trips to Las Vegas Casions, and an baseball game, can you?

I love you dad.

Happy Birthday.

Birthday Re-Cap

Contrary to my Gemini nature, I have to make this brief.

Monday was a milestone birthday and I'm happy to say I passed it with very little trauma. Mostly because of all the support, friendship and love from my friends and family.

My day:

Slept in till 8am.

Realized I had no coffee cream or Splenda so I threw on some clothes and ran to the local grocery. Also picked up fresh blueberries for my grape nuts that I promptly ate upon my return home.

After that I watched an episode of 90210 Season 4 from Netflix. Awesomeness.
And enjoyed some bonding time with my sofa.

Nevada showed up with a gift and champagne and OJ. We had a birthday toast, drank Mimosa's and chatted. We walked up to the nail salon to get pedicures. I had my first pedicure by a man. A little strange but ok.

Walked back to my house and headed out to go shopping. I'm in love with Ann Taylor Loft. They are like Banana Republic. Good quality clothes that are classic and will look good next year.

Here a miracle happened. I bought a two piece swimsuit, a tankini type with a halter style neckline. Shows off just the right amount of cleavage.

Came back to my house where we promptly inhaled our lunch of cheese-sticks and roast beef sandwiches. (Birthdays are calorie free)

Nevada had to get going after lunch and I attempted to do a little cleaning, which really turned into more lounging on my part.

Time to get ready for dinner. Spruced myself up, and donned my new dress with the little hummingbirds all over it, and my new sparkly sandals. WHOO HOO.

Meanwhile, fielding phone calls and messages from folks full of good cheer for me.

Rachel picked me up at 6:45 and we headed out for my birthday dinner at O'Mara's.

A nice Irish and family friendly restaurant. I was met by Connie and Lisa. Amy, and Becky joined us a few moments later.

Lots of laughing, wine and good food followed. Including an incident where we accidently forced our bus boy to pause and become our photographer.

And of course I had to finish the evening off with a piece of homemade carrot cake.

Nice gifts to boot, but more importantly, I was surrounded by smart, funny and warm hearted friends on my birthday.

Thank you. I love you all.

Sometimes I feel Like a Girl

Today is lunch with Becky and her daughter Lucie. I'm excited to meet Lucie, as of yet I've only dreamed of her and I've seen her in photos.

It's nice knowing that on a beautiful sunny day I won't be stuck in the office all afternoon. This is the sort of amazing day we get every now and then in Michigan.

Even better, this afternoon I'm getting my hair cut. Hooray! Nothing says summer quite like a new look to keep things fresh.

Faced the scale showdown and lived to tell about it. I lost a small amount but it's really not about that. It's about not gaining. And keeping on this journey for the long haul.

And it's about wearing a girly dress that I wouldn't have been able to fit into or even have the confidence to wear a few months ago.

Heart-Breaker

Scenario: Fancy shopping mall in Troy inside Macy's.

Me: Walking to the bathroom. Near the Men's Department.

There is a handsome and nicely dressed man holding hands with a beautiful blond child wearing a sundress.

Enter a beautifully blond woman in a sundress. She starts moving quickly in her strappy heeled sandals while crouching down and talking to the child:

"It's Mommy. Mommy's here honey."

Cut to Handsome husband looking at his wife adoringly and saying:
"Hello Sweetheart."

He then kisses her while their pretty daughter smiles on.

And at that moment I was overcome with an equal mix of awe, sadness, joy and wonder.

I want to be some body's sweetheart.

Grace is Gone

Watched a good movie last night, titled you guessed it, Grace is Gone.

Starring my boyfriend, John Cusack.

Short synopsis, he's a dad taking care of his two daughters while his wife is serving in Iraq.

Can I tell you it was intense? And sad? But powerful. I've been thinking about it off and on all day and I don't think it's all because of Mr. Cusack. He was a bit dowdy in this role, but he sure could play a convincing father.

I really liked the fact that the movie didn't wrap up all tidy at the end. It was an audience winner at Sundance for drama.

If you're a fan of John Cusack or just good movies that don't have the Rock in them, don't miss this one. It just came out on dvd. I watched it on Netflix.

D Day

David Sedaris's new book came out today. I've been stalking this release for months. It was snowy and cold and I thought, just wait. One day, it'll be almost summer and you'll be reading David's new book. You like how I say David as if we're friends?

I read everything he writes and have actually met him at a reading, so in a way I do feel like we're friends. We had a brief conversation about his new computer and why you can't eat Cheetos while using it,and about his dad.

In my opinion a good writer makes you feel welcome. Lets you into their world and invites you to take a seat. And he does.

His new book is titled, Engulfed in Flames. I can't wait to start reading.

He's one of a handful of writers that I'll actually spend the money to buy the hard back copy on day its released into the book wild. And it was technically free, since I was using up a gift card from Christmas.

And since I had a few dollars left over, I bought myself a 4 piece box of Godiva chocolate. A good read always tastes better with a snack.

As long as the snack isn't in the ETO family:

Cheeto
Frito
Dororito
Taquito

Table for One

I need work friends. I used to have some. But between company lay-offs and people leaving on their own accord, I find myself alone. In an office full of people. But you understand what I mean. No friends to come in and chat with about the weekend.

True, I got a few casual friends, but we haven't broken out much past the polite and into the real.

Consequently, this makes me shop or wander around during my lunch break. I can't think of anything more depressing than sitting in here alone on a beautiful sunny day, perched in front of my computer.

In some ways it's nice. I tend to get my errands done during the day now leaving me time at night to meet a friend for dinner or go for a long walk.

The funny thing is, I used to enjoy my solitary lunches. They were a nice escape from the chaos. And I'm one of those people who genuinely enjoys my own company. But, it's nice to share a sandwich now and then, don't you think?

SEX and The City

Readers who haven't seen the movie yet, may wish to stop reading now.

As a loyal SCTC watcher, I was pleased with the movie. I can't imagine the immense pressure the whole movie was under and part of the reason I wanted to see it as soon as possible after its release was so I wouldn't get caught up in the swells of the hype.

Both me and the movie succeeded. There were hot men, hot shoes, and clothes to be sure. But for me, the show and the movie have always at its heart been about friendship between women.

That to me was the true love story. Friends that have been there for every major milestone in your life but also are so involved in your daily life, you can discuss mundane things like which shampoo works best or what you might make for dinner.

And as the four women move throughout their lives, there's no doubt that they'll always be there for each other.

Strong women need other women. I don't think it makes them weak to admit such things.

Bad days get better when you've got a friend's shoulder to cry on, and happy news is best shared.

To all my friends, single and married:

thank you for helping me live this life, for believing the best of me, for encouraging me, for listening, and for always showing up.

Annie Put Down the Gun

I was eight years old the first time I ever saw a professional Broadway show. And what did I see?

My mom took me to see Annie at the Fisher Theater in Detroit. I loved it. And still do.

This past weekend, I got a chance to see it again, more than 20 years later and it resonated as much now as it did then. Say what you will. But Annie is full of hope and optimism despite her troubling life.

I don't expect to get adopted by a Daddy Warbucks...I'm holding out for Sugar Daddy.

Kidding.

But it reminded me that sometimes despite everything, you've just got to believe that tomorrow the sun will shine.

A birthday plus a holiday

It's the first official weekend of flip flops, shorts, bbq's beer and sun. With plenty of sunblock on my pale Irish skin.

Yes, it's that time. Time for me to head up North to Lake Leelanau with friends in tow to take in some wineries, beaches, maybe a meal out or two and mostly just relaxation.

I know we've got my cousin's 25th birthday party which will be a good time to see all the cousins.

I can't believe she's 25. It seems like I was just at Mckenzie's high school graduation party. I remember freaking out about turning 25 because it was close to 30. To ease the transition my best friends Connie and Karlene threw me a surprise party. Complete with my favorite foods that included Sloppy Joes, and California Pizza. We even had a pinata.

Good times. I was late to my own surprise party though because I was looking at pictures of David Duchovney on the Internet.

Not sure if there will be any David at McKenzie's party...I'm just hoping for a piece of cake.

We'll be celebrating another birthday on Sunday. That of my friend Nevada. She's also turning 25. It's the funniest thing. I've known her a few years, and we've enjoyed her 25th birthday a few times now. :) Must be something magical in the water.

She has bravely agreed to make this road trip with me. I'm certain that we'll all have lots to chat about. We're Gemini's for godsake and we just don't shut up.

I'll Have What She's Having

Last night's Dinner:

1. Grapenuts with fresh blueberries
2. Glass of White Wine
3. Biscotti


A balanced meal is in the eye of the beholder.

Hanging in Charleston

My weekend was awesome.

Got to Charleston Thursday afternoon and was promptly picked up by Roo. Brian and I then headed toward our weekend beach house which was spectuclar. It was huge and was ocean-front.

It was amazing, like something out of a movie. I stayed with a bunch of people, I didn't know, but it turned out well. Everyone was laid back and friendly.

Got up Friday. Went for a walk on the beach. Played in the waves in the ocean,lost my sunglasses to a giant wave and then went with a few girls to get manicures. Came back got ready for the wedding. IT was beautiful. Danced and drank a bit at the reception. Then we hosted an after party at our house.

Saturday morning woke up with a headache went for a walk on the beach and then had breakfast. After that I had to get ready to go home. Boo hoo.
I loved being at the beach. And it was great to see Roo again after all this time.

I hope him and Ginny have a wonderful life together.

Roo's Getting Married

My first male roommate is tying the proverbial knot on Friday.

Not to me, god no. You ever have one of those friends that you love dearly and the thought of them in other context, well, "just isn't right?" That's me and Roo.

Roo and I met at Portfolio Center in Atlanta. More specifically, the first time we met was at a gas station in Michigan with my dad giving poor Roo the stare down. He was not thrilled with the idea of my male friend.

But I was. Roo was a great roommate and a really cool guy. Sure, he had fridge blindness, didn't unload the dishwasher, or remember to buy paper towel, but he did lots of other things.

Like listen to me cry and have girl melt-downs, drive my drunk self around after a night of drinking, introduced me to a bunch of crazy photographer friends, including his soon to be wife, Ginny, and he used to wait up for me at night if I was out.

We laughed, listened to lots of Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan, and we just clicked.

Roo even forgave me when I accidentally almost chocked him to death while we tried to drag his mattress up our two flights of stairs.

Tomorrow morning, I board the plane to take me to South Carolina, to see Roo and Ginny get married.

I'm thrilled that after all these years, we still have things to say and I took a chance, apparently telling Roo within 5 minutes of meeting him via phone, "We should live together."

And I'm glad we did. He was one of the best roommate's I've ever had and I'd bet he'd say the same about me.

Life is funny. Some people stick. Roo and I stuck.

More on the wedding when I return.

Two Dozen

Things I did today:

1. Went to work.
2. Got aches in my shoulders, neck and head.
3. Ate lunch at my desk.
4. Peed about 6 times.
5. Drank lots of water and one Diet Coke from the can.
6. Walked almost 4 miles after work.
7. Used Target's bathroom like a dressing room.
8. Ate Chicken Kabob for dinner.
9. Shopped and smelled lotion.
10. Drank half a glass of wine, as that's what was left in the bottle in the fridge.
11. Read Entertainment Weekly mostly cover to cover in 20 minutes.
12. Cranked up my ipod.

Things I didn't do:

1. Kiss anybody hello or goodbye.
2. Throw up my lunch.
3. Eat dessert.
4. Trip. (This is a big deal)
5. Watch any West Wing
6. Cure Cancer
7. Skip town
8. Wait too long in traffic.
9. Go to the zoo.
10. Get a new job.
11. Write the Great American Novel.
12. Cut my hair.

Iron Man

I like Superheros. Or certainly movies about them. And why not? They're usually empowering and fun to watch without taking themselves too seriously. And this weekend, I took in Iron Man with Robert Downey Jr. It was well done and RDJ is a good actor that was believable with just the right amount of arrogance. Note to men: Some confidence is sexy. The kind that lets you just back up into any space or drive like you mean it, good.

Too much arrogance where you tell a woman what to do because you're sure your way is better? Not sexy. But I digress.

Maybe I enjoyed the movie because I went in with no expectation whatsoever and thus, could hardly be disappointed.

My love of Superhero's started early with my two brothers and our Saturday Morning cartoon ritual of eating cereal in front of the TV so we wouldn't miss the Superhero Sleepover. Can't remember the official name, but all of them would hang out in the same Justice League and solve crimes.

The next Superhero love affair will probably be with the Batman Sequel. Christian Bale was a great Batman, and I'll wait for him to swoop in with a good story.

Granted, not all Super hero movies are created equal, but this one was worth the trip.

Boys Gone Wild

I'm coming to you from the foggy depths of my hangover. Witty banter is trying to come to the surface, but it's currently being blocked by too many Blue Moon's, chicken strips, second hand smoke, and an almost bar brawl in which this guy was 3 seconds short of grabbing my ass, when my friend Nevada who is a foot taller and could see the incoming hand, pushed him away at which point, he told her she was being disrespectful.


Bar fighting much like Kung Foo just isn't my forte. I'm somehow always right in the middle. Once in college, I was at a crowded keg party when two guys started fighting, and guy A got so mad he hauled off and hit guy B, but instead of hitting guy B, he punched me right in face.

Fast forward 30 seconds and I'm crawling out of the party on my hands and knees.

Besides some hand to hand combat training that is required when one grows up between two brothers, I just don't have the skills needed to have a proper bar fight.

Guess we can't all be Patrick Swayze in Roadhouse, can we?

Roof Party

Tonight is the night. We celebrate Rina's departure and move to Chicago. I'll refrain from saying the Windy City but it's right there in my head. Wanting to come out.

Looking forward to seeing lots of old friends from lots of old ad jobs. I can't believe Rina and have been friends over over two years. Day after day in an advertising agency and the time flies by. Maybe cubicles are actually just portals to another land, where time moves at warp speed, but then slows down to crawlspeed when you're working on certain projects.

Alas, let the drinks and memories flow. At least I'll have another person to visit, next time I'm in my neighboring city.

Good Luck Rina!

Photos of the Emerald Isle

To see Ireland Photos from my trip:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/kelwriter/

Tis Ireland

Dear Blog,

Nice to see you. I know it's been awhile. How have you been? Hope all is well.

Here's what I've been up to. I went to Ireland in early April, and it was wonderful and amazing. I will post some pictures soon, but I just downloaded them this past weekend.

But I loved it. I went with my mom and we got along pretty great the whole trip.
We saw all the usual stuff, Ring of Kerry, Cliffs of Mohar, Kilkenny Castle, Powerscourt Waterfall, the Powerscourt Estate, and tons and tons of quaint villages full of pubs, people, and pints. I really felt comfortable and at home there. Maybe it's because I'm Irish, but it was just the people. Amazingly friendly and so upbeat.

Lovely and Brilliant were common phrases out of their mouths in answers to questions. We rented a car with a GPS in it, we'd named Stella. Poor Stella was out of date, and everytime we drove on a road she didn't know, she'd get upset and say, "Recalulating. Recaulating." She did this a lot.

I didn't worry about what I ate, what day or time it was, or if I should have another pint or not. I just did.

I can't wait to go back.

Ireland was indeed lovely and brilliant.

He's Coming Soon

Happy Easter to everyone!

Have a good weekend. I'll be heading up I-75 to see the mom.

Hope the bunny's good to all of you.

Back on Tuesday.

Thoughts on a Tuesday

Winter is passing. Or certainly my interest in it is fading quickly. Today on my way to work, my car was crazily vibrating. I'm hoping it's just the bent rim on the passenger side. It's being looked at right now.

It's those little things that throw me for a loop. But good news. My dad seems to be doing better this week, than he was last week, so I'm thankful for this, of course.

Work is passing slowly today. I've finished a story and now I'm ready to start another one, so I'm thankful that my writing bug is back.

Someplace to put my thoughts and keep them close together. Somewhere to channel the crazy. Someplace to say whatever I want, without repercussion. No wonder I used to like it so much.

And on that note, I'll be getting back to it.

And Baby makes 2

My work day is creeping toward the end of it.

Yay!

Then it's off to my dad's to help him. He's not feeling well. And I feel bad. I'm gonna spend the night there to hang out with him.

I brought some old movies and some Arrested Development on dvd for comedic relief, but we'll probably just end up watching Cops, cause that's what he likes. Doesn't matter to me.

Sleep didn't come easy last night, so now it wants to come far easier now.

In brighter news, K. had her baby today! A girl. What a wonderful surprise. Well, I'm sure it wasn't really a surprise to her, but you know, you never know when that phone call will come from your friend that is expecting.

Go NOW

I am ready for winter to leave. Now, please.

In other news, I've been trying to keep myself busy visiting people and going to the gym to chase away the winter blahs.

Some days it works. Some days it doesn't. I've got a headache. But I've already had pain medicine today. Can't really have anymore.

Looking forward to going home today. Mostly cause then I won't be here.

Post Oscar

Last night was the Oscars. And the Oscars Party. It was a lot of fun. Lots of fancy cocktails, food and waiters in tuxes. Kind of like prom, minus the teen angst.

That dress was an old bridesmaid dress, but a classic style that I was able to wear again.

Highlight of the evening, Cookies decorated in the likeness of the nominees. Which is how I ended up taking George Clooney home. Micheal Clayton indeed.

Thanks for inviting me Tonya.

And the Enevolpe Goes To...

When I was a teenager, I started a love affair with award shows. I love seeing all the celebrities dressed to the 9's, while wishing I could sleep with most of the tuxedo clad men. And I especially loved moving acceptance speeches where a weepy Tom Hanks spoke with honest emotion about his love for his wife, Rita Wilson.

One year in my early 20's, I even got my friend Karlene to dress with me in fancy Oscar attire, while we watched from the living room and sipped apple juice and champagne.

Another year, I went to a coffeehouse that was hosting the festivities and won prizes based on random Oscar trivia.

This year?

I'm attending an Oscar party with a friend at a fancy hotel in Birmingham with free drinks and food. Dressing up is encouraged.

I'm plotting my acceptance speech now.

I'll take 2

I had a good weekend. Watched Martian Child with John Cusack. It was interesting and made me think, so that's always a good thing. And of course John Cusack, you can't go wrong.

Also, had my taxes done and I'll be receiving my refund in about a week. Ireland, here I come. Not sure I mentioned that trip in this space yet, but I'm going to Ireland in April. I can't wait. My mom and I are gonna tear up those pubs and lovely green hillsides.

More on this later.

And, I've decided to take some of my refund and buy myself some cute spring clothes. I am still losing,but some pretty new spring clothes will help with my mission. I never used to buy any new clothes as some sort of punishment for being overweight, which only made the problem worse. Now, I have steadily purchased along the way, so I can see my progress. Like much of life, this is a process that requires patience along the way. And celebration.

So, look out spring clothes. I'll be loading the closets soon.

I heart the snooze button

My mind's a bit foggy this morning. Seems my brain was whirling in the dead of night when it should have been resting. I was after all, sleeping.

Threw off my whole morning. No gym, overslept. Bah. I'll get there after work.

All you can do some mornings, is put on enough make-up to give the illusion you're awake, and drink lots of coffee in hopes the rest of you will catch up.

867 5309

The Eighties are back, or they were for a few hours on Saturday night. I went to a theme party with my brothers at a Knights of Columbus Hall. Complete with wood paneling and beer for $1.75 a bottle.

I felt like I was back in Grayling. But it was fun to relive the 80's now, with beer and less angst. The music back then was innocent and poppy fun.

The biggest thing I remember from the 80's was Strawberry Shortcake dolls, Quiet Riot and Eddie Van Halen. He was my first rock and roll crush.

Stay Away

Two and a half hours until official quitting time. Supposed to meet some work folks after work to hang out for a bit and I'm suddenly feeling a little sick. This won't do. I've already been sick a few times this winter, and I've actually got a theme party to go to tomorrow.

An 80s party. I've already combed the racks at thrift stores to find a suitable outfit.

So, whatever this is, I need it to leave me. Right now.

It really doesn't fit into my leg warmer shopping, gym toting, eye doctoring, I've got planned before the party.

YAY

Today I hit a milestone in my ongoing weight loss journey. A stubborn pound that had been hanging out since before Christmas, finally hit the road today, leaving me officially 30 and then some, pounds lighter.

Hooray! I'm ready to continue to tackle this weight, but for today, for this moment, I am forcing myself to enjoy what I've accomplished so far.

And it made me think about something: After reading a fellow losers journey, she asked, Why do you want to lose weight?

The short answer: To look good. To have more fun shopping, to sound like a shallow female. But that isn't the reason. It may have been that in the begining, but it has given me so much more.

Mostly, it gives me peace of mind. I don't feel trapped anymore by my own body. I no longer feel bad, every single morning when I get dressed. And it's not because I wake up thinking, "Damn, I'm hot."

Cause I don't do that, and I have serious doubts I ever will. But I do feel more at peace. That even if I don't lose anymore, it will be ok. That's not to say that I feel done or that I won't keep working hard to lose the rest, but I have improved my health greatly by doing what I have already done. My health is better, and I exercise on a regular basis.

I still don't love the gym, but I love the feeling I get when I'm done exercising. A bit tired, but refreshed and mentally, I always feel less stressed and a calm sense of it will be alright comes over me. Nothing else in my life gives me that feeling.

Sure, I still love a cupcake, but today I'm choosing better at each meal which gives me freedom to eat one every now and then. Chocolate with frosting.

Soundtrack for a day

Which came first?

The depression or the country music?

Swamped in both. Let's see who breaks first.

Thank You

There is still kindness left in the world. I was happy to discover last night.

I was doing my usual drive home and it was raining. So, of course as I'm barreling down the freeway, my driver side windshield wiper blade flys off, making the drive home a bit scary as I couldn't see.

Panicking, I rush to the local oil change place to get a wiper blade. I'd already been to the gas station and the girl behind the bullet proof glass told me she didn't have any wiper blades. I'm guessing if she was behind glass, wiper blades weren't a high priority.

As I pull into the oil change place, the open sign switches off. I pulled around anyway since I was desperate. The girl comes out to tell me they are closed. I tell her all I want is a wiper blade. Problem? The computer had already been switched off. She then tells me where else I could go.

The manager comes out and puts new wipers on my car for me and asks if I can come back tomorrow and pay him.

This morning, I happily stopped on my way to work. And got an oil change while I was there.

It was nice to know that when you're having a bad day sometimes you can still count on the kindness of strangers.

5 of 5

The rules are simple: post 5 links to 5 previously written posts related to key words, then tag 5 more people to do the same.

Family -
Friends - It was an Honor

Yourself - Phat Pants

Love - This is Spinal Tap

Anything I like - Shelf that Book

So, there is my selection: Hope you find them enjoyable. Since I don't know too many regular blogging types, I will tag, Kim, Laura and Courtney from Writer group, plus Barrie since I read her blog daily.

Writer Interuppted

I've started getting the urge to write again. Which may not seem like a big deal, but considering I've been neglecting my own stories for so long, and had no urge to even work on them, well I'm excited.

So, the other day I found this old draft of a story I wanted to start revising and now I cant find the file on my computer.

I did find a hard copy and if all else fails, I will just re-create the document, but let's hope it doesn't come to that.

In other news, I feel bad for Heath Ledger, his family, friends and daughter.

I just hope they don't talk about him for a week straight, digging for bad info.

Leave the man alone. Let his family deal with this. They don't need camera's in their faces.

I do but oh never mind

Today's recent train wreck of celebrity doings:
Eddie Murphy and his "wife" have already separated after a two week union. The couple released the following statement:

While the recent symbolic union in Bora Bora was representative of our deep love, friendship and respect that we have for one another on a spiritual level, we have decided to remain friends," the statement said.

WTF. Me on the other hand?

I am a dating disaster. A complete sham to female wiles and those women that seem to be born with that natural ability to wrap men around their fingers or draw them to their chests (not that it’s very hard), but as I about to enter my 34th year, I find myself single.

Dating reminds me of the probabilities section of statistics class. It's a numbers game.
The more you do it, the better your luck and etc. I don’t know about that. I’m not a mass quantity kind of person. And I’m not convinced that dating like you're shopping at Costco, and stocking up is the way to happiness.


Strangers on the street want to tell you how to meet a man. An older lady and I were chatting the other day while waiting in line at Walmart, and she asked if I was married. No, I said I'm not. She then asked me how old I was and when I told her, she said, "You may still have a chance."


Or the cashier at Kroger who wanted to know why was I single? I wanted to ask her why she was a 40-something cashier at Kroger. But I didn't. Because it's rude.

It will either happen or it won't, and that is how the story ends.

The Assorted Pack

Dogs run up to me on the street
straining on their leash
Instinctively knowing that I can’t wait
to pet them or rub behind their ears.


My dad was a Marine during the Vietnam War.
And a loner.
But when he was sick with cancer
I moved in.
Fed him, washed his laundry and kept him company.
I’m not a nurse.


I’ve had the same best friend since we were six.
She came up to me in her Dorothy Hamill haircut
And asked me to play on the swings.
Recently she asked me to be in her delivery room,
I was there
24 hours.
She had a boy.


I’ve worked in automotive advertising for years.
I don’t like cars.


I believe in love, but I'm not sure if the romantic kind believes in me.

Sometimes I don't want to learn a lesson.

I was always picked last in gym.
That's not picked at all.

Weekend Update

I'd knock on wood and tell you that I think I'm nearly healthy again. Although tired, but that is a constant.

So, Friday night I finally dismantled the Christmas tree and got the house cleaned up. I had meant to do this a week ago, but that cold thing took me down.

Saturday was more cleaning, and a walk to the library to exchange my West Wing DVD for some more yes, West Wing. Then Shane and Jeff came over for a visit, where Shane brought me my Christmas gift. (This was most helpful).

Then, I ran errands and Becky came over to dinner. We had Zumba and watched Once, about some street musicians in Ireland. I liked it, but I wouldn't say I loved it.

Sunday, I went to visit my brothers since they are practically neighbors. Shane and I hung out for a bit, went to Borders etc. Then we went to see BJ.

BJ and I played Double Dribble or some other titled video game on his old school pre wii Nintendo. I'm not a gamer by any means, but it was fun.

Then I came home to my never-ending pile of laundry. I've been washing clothes to give them away, as sorting clothes in an attempt to de-clutter my closets.

And that's all I've got for this Monday.

Visitor in a Strange Land

Slowly, I am making positive changes in my life. They don't have to be life altering either to have an upbeat impact on my mood. Surely, you're wondering what I'm talking about?

I'm referring to my banishment of quickie hair-cut chains a few years back and the addition of a new gym full of fancy equipment including personalized tvs on each treadmill.

And why does this matter? Well, the haircuts, because I finally realized my hair while I am certainly not obsessed with it, nor do I consider myself "high maintenance", is an important part of my daily appearance. That is when I took a recommendation from a friend for a good salon in Birmingham. The sort of place that offers food and drink while you wait, and employs a separate person that washes my hair, before my stylist comes to give me a cut.

At first, I felt ill at ease in this fancy new salon. Why had I come here and how much was the experiment going to cost me?

The answer of why was clear after that first cut. Sara, did an awesome job and took charge but gave me a great cut that looks good even after it grows out. I'm an official convert and will never go back for a $8.00 haircut again.

And the gym: Well, my old gym was the fitness equivalent of the dive bars I used to frequent. Kind of grungy, nothing fancy, outdated equipment, but at the end of the day it filled my gym requirements.

That was until they raised the price and never would include classes with your paid membership. I decided a change was in order and have landed myself at Yuppie Gym USA.

This gym reminds me of the hair salon or the new club in town. Swanky lightning, low slung cedar benches, fancy weight machines and a tanning bed in the ladies locker room.

I decided I deserve a nice environment to soothe my soul, even if it costs a little more.

I have been sick for almost a week now. It's getting old.

I think the cold part is over but I still have something that makes it possible for me to nap at any moment.

Hopefully this will pass.

The First of Firsts

My blog entry will today focus on an idea, I read on another blog, something called a First Meme or something. Basically, you take the first sentence from the first blog of each month for the previous 12.

Now seemed like a good time for reflection. And so here goes nothing:

Janurary 2007:

The first offical weekend of 2007 is fast approaching and I'm hanging out at work willing the clock to move faster.

Februrary:
Some days I wake up ready to tackle the world.

March:
Anna Nicole Smith.

April:
If one could throw up emotions, I'd be heaving my guts out right now.
May:
I can hear the theme music now.

June:
You know how writing makes you feel like you forgot to get dressed?

July:
Today I will head up I-75 on a holiday trek to visit my mom and my cousin.

Auguust:

On the agenda this weekend?

September:
After work today I am going to visit my dad.

October:
It's a rainy Monday.

November:

I've decided to compile a list of foods that I no longer eat or even like since I've started on my healthful journey to Healthavana!

December:
What a day!